Also today I would like to break a bottle of cheap champage (there’s a recession on you wastrels) over a little feature I would like to call Robots Among Us. This should not be confused with the Incubus album Fungus Among Us which has no bearing on anything, least of all the career of Incubus. All not that funny jokes aside, this is a serious column dedicated to finding and rooting out the most dangerous threat to all of humankind. No, I know what you’re thinking and it’s not H1N1, nor is it Corporate Greed and an out of control Wall St., neither, my compatriots, is it a impeding socialist revolution led by a racist who duped the public into electing him to the highest office in the land…no
…..it’s fucking robots.
All of the bluster over the “Economy” and “War In Iraq” and “Swine Flu” and “Health Care Reform” is a smokescreen. These nonesense issues are distracting us from what is actually important.
FUCKING ROBOTS PEOPLE.
For the inaugural posting, I will expose one of the most high profile robots masquerading as human: Roger Effing Federer. In the video below, please watch carefully as his gyroscopic stabilizers and carefully calibrated servos deliver the finishing blow to some poor, unsuspecting, eastern european human. The robots are out there people, let’s be vigilant.