So I returned from Nantucket a mere three weeks ago and am already jonesing to go back.  I thought it would help if I posted some tips about the island that only true locals know.  (AND TO GET EXCITED ABOUT MY UPCOMING RETURN TRIP!!!)


The W Nantucket is the way to go.  Towering 68 grey-shingled stories above Monomoy – this hotel offers pretty much everything.  It’s roughly 700 a night but the rooms and views are totally worth it.

I snapped this photo from my room looking out onto my balcony.  You can see the gorgeous ocean in the background.  There are other options for staying but none with WiFi and Room Service.  You might as well camp.


I was worried about getting around but the subway on the island is amazingly efficient.  Getting from the airport to the hotel was really simple and each one way ride is only 8 dollars.  A small price to pay when you consider scooter rental is somewhere in the range of 300 bucks a day.

There are local taxi services but I’m pretty sure the number you’re dialing literally rings to the driver’s cell phone.  Steve’s Taxi?  Yeah ok – that’s Steve.  In a fucking van.  Legit?  I’d say not.  Stick to the subway.  You can cruise to the Sconset lighthouse in no time.  It’s also the only way to get to Tuckernuck island which was only previously reachable by airplane.  The outlet mall there has some amazing deals.


Ok so for the most part you’ll probably be going to the beach with Fifi, Chadwick, Todd, and Amanda BUT when you do want to venture out on the town there’s a surprising amount of options from food to clubs to shopping to whatever.

After getting a good day drunk on – head to Nantucket Ice Cream on the wharf.  They’ve actually found a way to infuse Nantucket red clothing into their delicious ice cream.  I know that sounds a bit unsettling but don’t worry.  It’s a smooth mixture of strawberry and whale chum that’s got an oddly salty finish.  Make sure to order this in a milkshake.  They love it when you call them milkshakes and NOT “frapps” as they say on the cape.  Remember Nantucket prides itself on it’s isolationist culture so don’t make this mistake.

Done stuffing your face with sweets?  Then why not battle a fucking monster on a whaling charter?  Contrary to popular belief, whaling is still absolutely 100% legal in Nantucket.  Besides tourism, this is the islands ONLY form of a local economy.  The practice was banned for most of the 70s and the island nearly turned into a ghost town.  What was once only a privilege to locals with (very hard to come by!) licenses is now available to visitors (albeit quite pricey).  Check out the monster Jamie helped bring in.

A standard whaling charter will last about 8 hours.  If your battle with the sea seems to be going longer you can usually grease the captain with a few grand to stay out longer.  Otherwise they go right for the kill shot.

Remember it gets cold there in the late afternoons and evenings.  If you need ANYTHING clothingwise – skip Murrays Troggery Shop altogether and head straight west to Tuckernuck Island on the green-line.

Those familiar with the Hamptons will be happy to know that outlet mall giant Tanger has taken over a large chunk of the island preserve.  They’ve got everything there.  You really can’t go to Nantucket without at least taking a peak at some of the ridiculous deals.  Check out these sneakers I got at the Bose store.  They’re awesome at the beach.  400 second anti-skip memory!

Got your new duds?  Then grab a quick chowder and head to the line forming at Magillicutty’s speakeasy back room quaintly titled “Scooners”.

sign outside Magillicutty's

By day this restaurant serves up some of the best chowder you will undoubtedly ever have, but by night the back room opens up to one of the CRAZIEST CLUBS WE’VE EVER BEEN TO.

Luckily for us we got in after only a 3 hour wait (so fast!) and lost our tits to an incredible set by Etienne De Crecy.  I have no idea how they coax such insane talent to this club.  The lineup alone for the week we were there was nuts.  Everything from John Talabot to Sander Van Doorn!

When 8am hits and the Cutty Sark is gone you just crawl back to your oasis in the W Monomoy and repeat the whole thing 3 hours later.  Leave some comments with other Nantucket hotspots!  I’m headed back in December (primetime)!


  1. Mallard says:

    Next time you hit up the island, make sure you pop by “Jasper’s Chunderbucket” by the scrimshaw museum. The walls are gilded with AUTHENTIC CHUM and the chunder is divine!

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