Step 0: Be born

Step 1: Be a terrible teen musician

Step 2: Have your family also be terrible at everything

Step 3: Form a band with everything that’s terrible in your life

Step 4: Go on CBS’ Early Show’s Singing Family Faceoff Competition

Step 5: Take your thinly veiled conservatism to the masses with this audible bile

Step 6: Puberty

Step 7: Never get laid

Step: 8: Realize that you can’t until you’re married anyway

Step 9: Pills

Step 10:

5 Responses to “OH JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP J4”

  1. Matthew says:

    …. I really hope they kill themselves.

  2. James says:

    You know who else had a lead singer bass player… WINGER.

  3. [...] apocalypse, whether or not the Lindberg baby was REALLY kidnapped, Falcon Heene, the success of J4, Harry Whittington’s recovery progress, and [...]

  4. Carter says:

    holy shit

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