BOYFRIEND GETS HEAD SLICED OFF, REALIZES GIRLFRIEND IS A FUCKING IDIOT IN AFTERLIFE HINDSIGHT

So it’s already humiliating enough to get your head chopped off by a stolen stop sign in the back of pickup truck.  Some fratboy doosh bag will definitely pay for doing something so blatantly mindless, but does your girlfriend have to be the spokesperson to the press?  Oh wait, this happened in Santa Fe, NM… the state with the WORST public schools.

The tasteless humor continues when watching the video of the report which is prefaced by a streaming ad from Ford Motors.  Gotta love keyword based advertising.
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this may or may not be photoshopped.

MY DOG HAS BEEN NEUTERED

How fucking humiliating.  Poor guy, looks like my life accessory got some accessories.  Blame my girlfriend.  Well we’ll just make sure he doesn’t try and go to any casinos.  Gee thanks, now he’ll just lick his balls even more.  Nothing like doggie cock breath.  I said it
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BUT I JUST WANNA PLAY

Step 1: Be a man
Step 2: Wish you were a woman
Step 3: Smoke a ton of meth
Step 4: Put on the following clothes

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Step 5: Go to a casino
Step 6: Get denied at the door for being inappropriately dressed
Step 7: Sue for 15,000 dollars
It happened

WTF: DIGITAL PHOTO URN

You know what I want to do?  Stuff my dead dog’s ashes into a box complete with 7″ screen and USB connection. 

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From the products manufacturer:

Display all of your favorite pet photographs with the latest in digital memorial technology. Available in Oak or Walnut wood, these photo urns represent a new generation in memorial design and capability.

With a 7″ diagonal screen you can display literally hundreds of your favorite pet and/or human memories. Each digital frame includes a battery operated remote control, a large 256 megabyte internal memory, power supply cord, and USB computer cord for transferring photo’s or audio files from your personal computer to the internal memory.

This urn has two compartments which you access from the removable bottom. The 1st compartment holds the digital frame while the 2nd has 95 cubic inches of space inside, accomodating pets from 0-75 lbs.

COOL AS FUCK: ARTIST USES DHL AND A GPS TRACKING DEVICE TO MAKE LARGEST WORK OF ART EVER

While surfing Gizmodo, I stumbled across an amazing piece (albeit a marketing ploy for DHL) where artist Erik Nordenankar mailed a package containing a GPS device around the world.  The tracking data of said GPS formed the following self-portrait.  Check the youtube below for more info.
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WTF: WALMART –> BABY –> TRASHCAN –> BURRITO

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THINGS TO READ: SATURDAY MAY 24TH, 2008

WHEN MEN TURN INTO A PIRATES: A DISCUSSION OF ALCOHOL, SPRING BREAK, AND DOOSHBAGS IN PANAMA CITY BEACH, FL

listen at 1:34 for the shift from human, to pirate.

“HONEY… WHAT DOES ALLAH SAY ABOUT TREADMILLS?” TISK TISK

YOUR COMPUTER IS A BOMB